Vintage Vegas

Thankyou Bally's for including breakfast that cannot be room serviced, and must be eaten before 9am. That's 3 breakfasts to you - it seems the house does always win.

Yours truly can be found breakfasting in Starbucks at Planet Hollywood about 2 hours after the Break'o'Dawn Ballys breakfast expires where my husband, my gusband and I plan our day.

Grant and I want to do a downtown old school day so we offer to let PAR off the hook in case he'd prefer a bucket of buffalo wings at hooters but he delightfully agrees to come along, a decision he will instantly regret as I accidentally spend 30 minutes in the Betty Page store buying gorgeous frocks.

First stop post Betty Page is out to the Vegas sign for our photo op, and to Mandalay Bay to pick up our Lion King tix.

Second stop, the El Sombrero, the oldest restaurant in Vegas. I have read about it many times and want to go for its vintage neon sign, and its famed Mexican food. Unfortunately my google mapping skills are not of Amazing Race standards and Grant and I have to almost get divorced three times trying to find the freakin thing.

Its well worth the trials and tribulations though -the El Sombrero is GOLD, the food is fabulous and costs a cent, and we soon become best friends with Mrs Sombrero who tries to give me her salsa recipe but my eyes glaze over as soon as she starts grilling me on what type of chillis we grow in Australia - what? there's more than one kind? now chillis are the little red things, right?

From there we trawl all our favourite downtown vintage stores. Of course Bob at Retro Vegas has the PERFECT mid century screen for our living room at only about three times the amount we have budgeted for it ... but its three times more fabulous than anything else we've seen ... hello... is this thing on?...

Peter has been VERY patient so we head to Starbucks at the Fashion Show Mall to re-caffeinate and to stare in awe at the amount of shopping people have, (and to visit American Express to CASH UP baby!!)

As the sun goes down we head back to our brown floral SUITES to glamorise for The Lion King. I am wearing my new leopard print Betty Page frock of course. As I twirl around the room loving myself sick i fall on my ankle and SNAP - the archilles injury I have been nursing for six months instantly goes back to square one. I am devastated and grumpy as hell. And then as we head to the car i realise my new frock has static electricity! What next!? I'll tell you what next ... The Lion King is the WORST. SHOW. EVER>>>>>>>>>>> soooooooooooooooo boring. kill. me. now. The only highlight was that the champagne was served in a cup the size of a milkshake cup! no regrets.

We discuss leaving at interval but the tickets cost a bomb and there are some cute chorus boys so we continue our self induced coma until the bitter end. zzzzzzzzzz Circle of life people, circle of life ....

We (i) hobble back to the car on my ruined dancers pins - god bless Grant for choosing valet, and then we go to a FABULOUS dinner that the three of us have sworn never to speak of .... I can't say any more ... I've said too much already....

Back to Paris to play Dean Martins wild party for a while, and then the boys head off to Ballys Jubilee bar while I head off to change into my orthopedic Kumfs and out of my static electricity torture chamber (now my hair is standing on end - what the hell!?)

I join the boys for a nightcap and then Grant and i head to the brown floral SUITE as PAR whiles the wee small hours away with his favourite cocktail of dollar beers and Grinder.

Have I mentioned Vegas is SUPERB in every way.