Even though the gay caballeros have been awake for 24 hours, we are off to see Miss Carol Channing at the Spotlight 29 Casino. The spotlight 29 casino is A LONG way away. The spotlight 29 casino is just off the highway, past a strip club, and just after the truck wash, on the corner of "help" and "kill me". Two minutes after entering the spotlight 29 casino, we realise Carol Channing is not on at the spotlight 29 casino - we are at the wrong casino . Luckily, the valet, who has been parking beverly hillbilly trucks all night is so sure we are at the wrong casino that he hasnt even bothered parking the car. "wrong casino?" he asks as we jump in and speed away, past the glamour of the truck wash, and the strip club and a few vacant lots, clearly full of dead bodies and frizzy haired whores.
Twenty minutes later we enter the WAY more glamorous agua Caliente casino -yes, the casino we PASSED on the way to spotlight 29 - yes, the one PLASTERED with Carol Channing posters. Let us never speak of this again.
We enter the theatre as Carols opening clip show is on. Thank Goodness we have hardly missed a thing and OH EM GEE we are in the second row in a giant theatre roughly the size of the Palais.
Following the clip show Carol makes her grand entrance on to the stage in a rolls royce accompanied by her ADORABLE husband - FABULOUS. She looks very frail but still glittery and glamorous in a sequin encrusted pant suit - she is way more frail than the night we became best friends at the christmas tree lighting. It is only later we learn that she has been in hospital all week, and has just come out to do the show!
The show is a bizarre cobbled together variety show running around three hours, featuring some sort of Johnny Young Talent School backup dancers, special guests Rich Little and Bruce Villanch, and some bizarre Broadway Tony winners we have never heard of and fabulous Carol, never on stage without her adorable husband who helps her teeter on and off stage and reminds her of her lines when her memory fails.
They are the most adorable couple I have ever seen, both in their 90's and all four of us are in tears just watching them together.It is one of the most touching things I have ever seen.
Carol soldiers through her hits - a diamond ring is thrown into the audience during "Diamonds Are a Girls Best Friend" and with the elbowing power of my husband and two gusbands I am the lucky recipient of the diamond ring!
We sing "hello dolly" to her (tears), and she loses her way in her "hello dolly" monologue and harry gently coaches her through it. (tears again) I would not have missed this for the world.
It is a magic night, and we are all on cloud nine.
We pop out to a glamorous bar for some afterglow cocktails - champagne all round and then ewwwwwwww -that's not the french champagne we have been drinking all day - that is cats pee! Thus the term, "is it French... or is it MISTER French" is coined, and is asked many many times at many many bars in the days and nights to come.
I LOVE Miss Carol Channing and I shall treasure my Carol Channing Ring forever.
happy happy days.
SAD PS - even though we all thought this would be the last time Carol Channing would ever be seen on stage, we are shocked and saddened to learn that her darling husband died three days after this event.
Devastated.
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